Surprising Changes

I went for my yearly exam last week and they called me yesterday with my blood work. My cholesterol has never been super high but it dropped over 50 points since the last time I went, I am also insulin resistant and my insulin is great and I have cut the pill I have to take in half over the past year and once I am done losing weight I might be able to get off of it completely (that is not totally controlled by my weight so I will just have to wait and see about that).

Last week I lost 4 pounds and 1.5 inches, this week I think it will be a different story. I haven't felt well - I found out last week I might have to have some minor surgery and it just put me in a funk. I haven't been overeating but I haven't been making the best choices either. On top of all that my throat hurts. I know excuses, excuses. I have been working out all week (today I think that my trainer was trying to kill me - I have ice on my legs as I type this!)

I hope this blog helps inspire someone because I am not inspired at the moment. I am so thankful for this contest but I am beginning to be ready for it to be over so that I don't have to feel so anxious every week for weigh in. Do not get me wrong...I am so grateful for this opportunity!!! I feel like I won when I was chosen and I have never worried about winning overall. I wanted to do the contest so that I could have the personal training and support and so I could learn HOW to work out. That being said I will be glad once it is over for the fact that if I don't lose weight one week I don't have to feel bad. When I go in tomorrow and most likely don't lose weight or maybe even gain I am going to feel awful! If I was at my house and I am the only one that knows that I gained or lost I won't be in such a funk. Oh well wish me luck!

On a very bright note I ran on Monday and I was able to run a little over half a mile in just over 6 minutes! I am going to run the 5K at the end of March, I may have to walk a minute/run a minute the whole way but that is ok...I will finish at some point. I can almost bet my husband will be able to run the 5k twice in the time I run it once!

2000 calories!!!

Oh my I have eaten like a crazy person today. Bella is out of school for a few days so I guess I feel like I am on vacation. We went to get biscuits this morning, then went to Chatt with my mom and the kids so we went to our favorite place...Bea's....if anyone knows about this place you know that they have the BEST fried chicken in the world! So of course I ate a piece, and pinto beans, and little potatoes in some kind of sauce. Then to finish all that off, Bella wanted Krispy Kreme since we were in Chattanooga. Now I couldn't let her eat a doughnut by herself could I?

Now I know I shouldn't have eaten all that but I did. The old Lori would have said "oh well, I will just start again on Monday" and then I would have proceeded to eat myself into oblivion for the rest of the weekend. But I am a new Lori, I realize that I am not on a diet. I am totally changing my lifestyle. Will I eat "bad" some days during my new lifestyle?...YES! Will I decided that I will make better choices tomorrow or for the next meal....YES! It is ok to eat badly every once and awhile. It is not OK to make bad choices at every meal.

Now, an update on my weigh ins. Last week I lost 1.5 pounds and about the same in inches and then this week I only lost .2 pounds...BUT I gained 2 lbs of muscle and lost 2 lbs of fat! I also lost 2.5 inches and almost an inch of that was my hips which is where every woman wants to lose weight! When I looked at the scale before going to the Y this week I wanted to cry. My scale measures a little higher than theirs so I thought I had actually gained weight but once I got in there and they did measurements I felt a lot better. That being said, if you are out there and reading this and are discouraged by the numbers on the scale. Do some measurements! It will make your outlook a lot better. Now, I am in a competition so I want to lose weight but I am ok with gaining muscle. I can already wear clothes that I used to wear when I was 15lbs lighter so I know that my body is changing even if the numbers on the scale are not what I want.

I will say one last thing. I was really beginning to get frustrated with not losing more weight. I am eating 1200-1500 calories a day and exercising and burning ALOT of calories a day (sometimes 1000), so I feel like I should be losing more but once I stop and think and realize that my measurements are showing that I am losing even if the scale doesn't I calm down a little.

So stinkin hungry!

The past few days I have been so hungry! I have been working on my healthier lifestyle for about a month now and I have amazingly had very few struggles with food. This week though I want to eat ALL THE TIME! I am just trying to figure out the best healthy options when I get so hungry I want to eat my arm (hey I would lose weight that way wouldn't I....) Yesterday I ate a piece of cheese, then a cracker, then an apple, then a cracker with peanut butter on it. I also ate chips for lunch which was not a good idea because it was just empty calories and that choice was probably what put me in the "hungry" cycle yesterday. Oh well I will make better choices another day and do better. Tomorrow is weigh in....pray for me =)

Moving Forward

For those of you who don't know....I am in a contest that the YMCA and MIX 104.1 puts on every year. There are 10 contestants and whoever loses the most weight (it is actually a percentage that takes in consideration more than just weight I believe) wins prizes. For me though, I won when I was chosen to be a part of the program. I get to go to the Y for free for about 2 months (that saves me almost $140!) and Seth can go too which is an added bonus because I am more motivated to go work out when he is off if he goes with me! I also get personal training sessions 2 times a week. This is why I wanted to be a part of the program. I have NO IDEA how to really get into shape. I have NEVER EVER been active in any way. I rode a bike as a kid but I never participated in sports...but hey I lettered in Choir so that has to count for something right? =)

I started off doing this because when I was Bella's age I began to gain weight and have been overweight ever since and I want to be a good example for her. I do not want her to go through what I did as a child, teenager, or adult. I am sure she will have other struggles but I want to do everything in my power to give her the tools she needs to live a healthy life and to maintain a healthy weight. I believe that starts with me getting healthy. I have been really careful not to call this a diet, I always say "mommy is doing this so I can be more healthy and active." Now that I am 3 weeks into the program, I am doing this for me! I am becoming a little addicted to working out. I absolutely love to dance in zumba class, kick in turbo, and be tortured by my trainer twice a week.

Tonight I was feeling a little sorry for myself because Seth is gone for the next 4 days so I made myself my favorite thing ever...cheese Fondue. Granted I made about 1/4 of what I usually make for Seth and I so I wasn't being all that bad but oh my goodness it made me so sick! I tried a sip of Bella's tea at dinner and it was disgusting. I helped Seth made brownies and Christmas Crack as we call it and I wanted to throw up from the smell. No I am not pregnant! For the past week I have discovered when I eat unhealthy I feel absolutely horrible. It is truthfully a little bittersweet for me.

Food was my escape, food made me happy, I would get depressed if I really wanted a Pepsi and I didn't have one in the house. It has been that way for over 20 years! Now, I am going to have to discover other things that make me happy. Of course, my family makes me happy, but when Seth sits down and eats 5 oreos a night (which he has every right to that boy runs almost 20 miles a week most of the time!) I am going to have to find something else to make me happy. I have discovered that exercise helps, but I can't do that at 9:00 at night! Maybe I will just write on here when I want a Pepsi and Butterfinger =)

Now I have written goals on this blog before but here are some new ones.

1. I will drink 12 cups of water today (I work out 6 days a week for at least an hour...usually more so I think I probably need more than the regular 8).

2. I want to be to my "ideal size" by my 10 year wedding anniversary at the end of July. Now my ideal size might not be my "ideal weight" as far as medical standards go but I will weigh less than I have in close to 20 years by then!

3. I will park and walk to get Bella at least 3 times a week (which her and the boys LOVE!)

4. After the contest is over I will continue to work out at least 3 times a week, hopefully 4!

5. I will be able to keep up with my kids when we go to Disney for the week at the end of March =)